


Getting Out Alive 2: Death On Wheels

by mother-zombie



Category: Uncle Grandpa
Genre: Horror, Mystery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-25
Updated: 2014-12-22
Packaged: 2015-01-19 20:54:56
Rating: M
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,279
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10781227/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/4606770/mother-zombie
Summary: Uncle Grandpa invites 20 lucky people to tour the UG RV, but it all takes a turn for the worst when everyone's favorite money-grubbing rat turns the friendly outing into a killing free-for all.





	1. Chapter 1

There it stood before me. The giant white vehicle obnoxiously decorated with various bright colored objects. With the backdrop of the bleak city around it, the fucking thing looked out of place. There were people already standing around it. I am assuming they are greatly anticipating this experience. I wasn't, of course. I may have been invited, but I was here for different reasons.

"Should we join them?" my friend asked in his croaky voice.

I sighed before taking a drag on my cigarette. I didn't answer him just yet. I don't think I was ready to answer him. We sat in silence for a moment longer before he spoke.

"Kev, listen, you know why we're here, and as soon as the stupid tour is over we'll confront him and force him to give us answers." he reassured me.

I took another drag of my cigarette before I spoke. "Yeah, but what if he doesn't know, Ned? What if we're attending this bullshit for nothing?"

"He knows. He has to. Nobody disappears in thin air like that." Ned reassured me, taking a drag of his cigarette before flicking it onto the pavement in front of us.

"Fine" I took one last drag of my cigarette before flicking it onto the pavement next to Ned's. "Let's go, then."

We made our way over to the group in front of the giant technicolor Uncle Grandpa RV and immediately I saw a few people I recognized. Most of the ones who recognized my presence, though, seemed to cower away. I'm not sure why, though. That's when I heard her voice.

"What? No way! How the hell did you get invited?" her shrill voice practically penetrated my ear drum. I'm pretty sure if she had been any louder I'd find my ears bleeding.

I turned to face her, and of course I was not surprised by what I saw. Black hair with red streaks, like as if she was trying to be hardcore while wearing an obnoxious yellow shirt with red polkadots and a pair of sunglasses printed across her bosom.

"Nac..." I unenthusiastically greeted her. "How did you get invited? Did you hack the database to find Uncle Grandpa's exact location and demand he make you one of the 20 lucky guests?"

"No!" Nac let out a laugh. "He recognized how big of a fan I was! Unlike you!"

"Try not kill people's ear drums with your fangirl bullshit. It's bad enough hearing you at lunch sobbing like a gross idiot over your laptop."

Nac stamped her foot before flipping me off and sticking out her tongue at me. Very childish.

I looked over to see if I knew anyone else, and I sure saw someone I knew.

"No! Please, dad! I don't want to go!" the acne covered boy pleaded as he clung onto an older man's leg.

"You got picked so you're going!" the older man commanded him in a gruff voice.

"I want to go back in my room! I'm still afraid! I'm not ready for this!" the boy cried, violently shaking his head. His mullet wildly thrashed around with him.

"I don't give a shit, Riley! You've spent enough time in that fuckin' shrink's office and it's about time you face your fears on your own!" the dad finally shoved him onto the ground.

The boy sobbed violently as he hugged his knees and rocked back and forth on the ground.

"Daddy, please!" he wheezed.

His father ignored him and just left the kid looking like a mess on the ground.

Riley used to be a good friend of mine, but ever since he got grounded, he never came back to school. I heard he developed extreme agoraphobia and wouldn't even leave his room. Of course, there was no doubt in my mind that Uncle Grandpa had some part in that.

As soon as I turned around to face the RV, the door swung open and a plump, old man did a backflip right out of it. He landed on top of the RV before out stretching his arms.

"GOOD MORNING EVERYONE!" the old man shouted in his annoyingly goofy voice.

"GOOD MORNING, UNCLE GRANDPA!" I heard the crowd shout back to him in unison, especially Nac, who began jumping up and down.

"Are you ready for the MOST AWESOMEST, EPICEST, EXTREMELY SUPER FASCINATING UG RV TOUR ADVENTURE SPECTACULAR?" he asked us.

"YEAH!" the crowd shouted back to him enthusiastically.

"YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES!" Nac screeched out. I had to cover my ears. She was so fucking annoying.

"Well then, come on in!" a smooth voice invited us from the door. We looked over and saw a sandy-haired male with sunglasses leaning up against the door frame trying to look like the coolest thing since sliced bread.

"PIZZA STEVE!" Nac let out a shrill shriek before swooning and falling over. I heard another girl swoon and sigh about Pizza Steve as well. She has long golden hair and a huge grin plastered across her face.

Pizza Steve motioned for us to come into the RV. Everyone began to pile in. The most excited ones rushing to be in front and the more reluctant ones tagging behind.

"C'mon, Kev!" Ned motioned for me to follow, because we were pretty much the last in line to get in. I nodded and stood behind the group that was taking a bit to get into the RV. While waiting to get in, I looked back and saw Riley still hugging his knees on the ground. I felt really bad for him, and I almost wanted to go over there and help him up. Before I could feel too nice, though, a small girl with bangs over her eyes shuffled over to the shivering mess of a kid and held out her hand.

"Hey, please do not be scared. Everything is going to be okay." she reassured him with a gentle, soft-spoken voice.

Riley looked up at her before taking her hand and getting up.

"I don't like being outside..." he told her.

"Well we should get inside the RV then. C'mon!" she motioned for him to follow before approaching Ned and I in line.

The girl looked up at me for a second before immediately turning her head away and trying to hide under her puffy sweater sleeves. I'm not sure why people do not like my awesome punk style, because every time they see me they hide. I really intimidate people with my style, but maybe it's better that way.

Once we were inside the RV, Uncle Grandpa was standing there with a bunch of weird looking people that I assume are part of his RV crew.

"Welcome to the UG RV, everybody!" a pale person with light pink hair greeted us. What was strange about this guy was the fact he had a zipper for a mouth. I feel like I stepped into some surreal horror movie, to be honest.

"Now, we're almost ready to start, but before we get started, how about you all take the time to get to know each other" a tall, muscular, dark-skinned male suggested.

"You never know what kind of friends you'll make!" a short, trendy girl with cat ears told us before giving us a grin.

"It's time for an ICE BREAKEEEERRR" Uncle Grandpa did a little dance before motioning for us to follow him. We all followed him into this room that looked like a camp ground. There were some logs set up around a small fire pit.

"Please, have a seat! Make yourself at home!" the zipper-mouth invited us all to sit down. I wasn't so sure how I felt accepting hospitality from that creepy mother fucker.  
>None the less, we all sat down. I sat next to Ned and that little girl who helped Riley get into the RV. Riley sat next to Ned.<p>

"Alright, here's how it goes! When I give you my eyeball, you're going to introduce yourself by telling us your name!" Uncle Grandpa told us before popping out his eyeball. "Ready?"

"That's disturbing, but also really cool!" a pale, scruffy looking guy with wolf ears said.

Uncle Grandpa handed his eyeball to a chubby looking kid. The kid wasn't even wearing a shirt.

"My name is Belly!" he told us before handing it off to a boy with a red checkered shirt who I recognized when I first joined the crowd.

"Adam's the name!" he told us before passing it off to the next person.

"Eddie!" a boy with an orange shirt told us with a hearty smile before handing off the eyeball.

"BRO-MAN-OR!" a large, muscular disgustoid with red skin shouted. They juggled the eyeball in their hands for a few moments before passing off the eyeball.

"Yvonne Smith, but you can call me Honey!" the blonde girl I saw earlier told us in a silvery voice before passing the eyeball off again.

"Sarah Nac! But you can just call me NAC" Nac began to tell us in her annoying voice. "And I am a HUGE fan of Uncle Grandpa! Like-" before she could finish a small man with teddy bear ears and a beard took the eyeball from her.

"I do believe he said just a name will do, miss" he told her before clearing his throat. "I am Villefoe" he told us before nodding and dropping the eyeball into the next person's lap without even batting an eye. He looked very unenthusiastic, like almost more unenthusiastic than I could be.

"Chester Warbler Zarke" the wolf-eared guy told us before passing the eyeball off to the next person.

"Charlie Burgers! Woof Woof!" a shaggy haired boy with dog ears happily told us before putting the eyeball in his mouth. "I lahv bahls" he told us as his mouth was stuffed with the eyeball.

"Bad dog! Give it to the next person!" Uncle Grandpa scolded.

Charlie growled before spitting it into the hand of the muscular woman next to him. The woman stared at it for a moment before clenching her fist.

"Xarna" she told us before placing the eyeball into the lap of the next person.

"Ule Gapa!" the angry blue disgustoid told us before pointing an accusing finger at Uncle Grandpa. "WHO IS NOT YOU!" he yelled before angrily shoving the eyeball into the next person's lap.

"Akira's the name!" a small boy with a red shirt greeted us before handing the eyeball over to the next person.

"A-Austin!" the small, shaggy haired boy squeaked as he tried to hand off the eyeball. Instead, it just slipped out of his hands and flew at the next person, who was Riley. Riley let out a shrill scream as he cowered away.

"I'm sorry!" Austin apologized.

Riley began to cry. "I-I'm..." he sobbed before taking a deep breath. "I'm Riley..."  
>He wouldn't even rejoin the circle. Ned had to scoot over to get the eyeball lying on the floor before introducing himself to everyone and giving the eyeball to me.<p>

"Kev" I introduced myself briefly before giving the eyeball to the small girl sitting next to me. She reluctantly, but quickly, took the eyeball from me.

"C-Celeste!" she squeaked out before quickly passing it and gently placing it into the next person's lap.

"Gabriella!" a girl with wavy brown hair and braces waved at us before handing it over to the next person.

"Anthony" a tall and slender guy about my age with a jet black fringe and heavy black eye makeup told us. He handed over the eyeball to the last person.

"Mooon Man~" a dark skinned male with white hair geled up into a pompadour told us.  
>Pizza Steve immediately lowered his sunglasses and gave Mooon Man a grin as he raised his eyebrows. Mooon Man returned the gesture by lowering his own sunglasses and raising his eyebrows at him with a grin.<p>

"Alright! Now that we know everyone's names, let's get on with the tour!" Uncle Grandpa told us as he put his eyeball back in and got up.

"Oh no you don't!" I heard a voice hiss. "Not after that snore fest I had to sit through!"  
>"NO!" Uncle Grandpa screamed. "IT CAN'T BE!"<p>

"Oh it is~" the voice laughed.

"No way! I took every precautionary measure imaginable!" the zipper mouth slapped his hands over his cheeks.

"What the hell, man!" Steve groaned.

The rest of us were just confused. I could tell everyone had no idea what was going on. Was this part of the tour? Was this not? Who knows?

"I'm just that good! You can't keep me away, you know!" the voice laughed.

**_Before anyone could react, something sprang out from the corner of the room._**


	2. Chapter 2

From the corner of the room sprang a giant pink rat. The rat landed on the fire pit, immediately putting out the fire as she landed. It stood there grinning evily at all of us as the smoke from the fire surrounded her. The smoke made her look creepier than she already looked.

"It's the one, the only, TANEZUMI!" the rat yelled before twirling and bowing.

"No!" Pizza Steve stamped his foot. "Impossible! Get out of here! You're not going to fuck this up too!"

"Steve-o!" the rat looked offended. "I don't ruin things! I make them better!"  
>"Don't hurt my friends, Tanezumi!" Uncle Grandpa pleaded.<p>

"I don't have to hurt them! Because they're going to hurt each other!" Tanezumi cackled.

Before we knew it, every window and exit door in the RV were covered with large metal bars and chains. Riley immediately began to freak out. He grabbed the log we were sitting on and clung onto it for dear life while hyperventilating.

"These chains are weak!" Xarna laughed before grabbing one of them. "I can break them open!"  
>She immediately began tugging on them. She grit her teeth and her muscles bulged as she struggled with the chain. No matter what she did, however, they didn't budge.<p>

"I'm sorry you transported any last bit of brain matter into those big guns of yours, lady, but you're not getting out of here!" Tanezumi laughed.

Xarna narrowed her eyes at the rat.

"That's enough!" the girl with the cat ears roared before lunging at the rat.

The rat, however, grabbed the girl's hair and swung her over her shoulder, sending the girl crashing into the wall face first.

"TIGER!" Uncle Grandpa and his gang yelled out in unison.

"Listen, I have no problem having Tiger killed again, but I haven't even explained the rules yet. I don't want to have to break out the spears." Tanezumi giggled menacingly.

Tiger rubbed her head as the muscular guy and the zipper mouth went to help her up.

"First of all, your in MY RV now! This is no longer the UG RV, this is the ZUMI RV. Got it?" the pink rat flipped her hair before snapping her finger, though I'm not sure why a rat has fingers. "Second of all, you are not allowed to try and hurt or kill me, because if you try, you won't be as lucky as Tiger was to just get thrown into the other wall. I will promptly and painfully execute you and use you as an example of what not to do."

The room was silent as everyone focused on the rat. I still wasn't sure if the rat was joking and this was just part of the entertainment for the tour or if this shit was legitimately happening.

"Third, if you want to get out, you have to kill each other!" the rat cackled.

"TANEZUMI NO!" Uncle Grandpa screamed.

"Tanezumi yes!" the pink rodent gave a malicious grin. "You have to kill each other, and if no one is able to find out you murdered you can leave!"

"This is insane!" UleGapa screamed.

"It gets better!" Tanezumi laughed. "Because I love chaos and death, I decided to add a new part, which is the final rule! Every night at midnight, one unlucky bastard will be randomly selected for a game of fear, which will include life or death games based on supernatural stories or urban legends!"  
>Uncle Grandpa began to cry. "Why would you do this to my RV and my friends!"<p>

"Shut up, old man!" Tanezumi flipped him off. "The RV is open for exploring between 8 am to 11 pm every day. I suggest you use that time to plan your murders accordingly. I also suggest you do not go to bed immediately at 11 pm, because at 12 am the random fear game selection will be broadcast for viewing in your rooms, which are all labeled accordingly with a nice television and camera system installed."

The pink rat then handed us all our own keys.

"Go find your rooms and happy murdering!" Tanezumi laughed before disappearing.

Uncle Grandpa was on the floor crying as Tiger and the zipper-mouth were trying to comfort him.

"Billy, this is awful!" Uncle Grandpa looked at the zipper-mouthed guy.

"I know..." Billy, the creepy looking guy trying to comfort Uncle Grandpa, turned to us. "Ii'm really sorry about all of this, but make yourself at home I guess!"

"And don't murder each other!" the muscular dark-skinned man said.

"Exactly what Mr. Gus said" Pizza Steve nodded.

We nodded and went to go look for our rooms in the crazy RV. I still couldn't believe this was actually happening. Ned tapped my arm as we walked.

"Is this some kind of crazy show for the tour or what?" Ned asked.

"I'm not sure, I think the rat was serious." I told him honestly. "But Uncle Grandpa is strange, so anything could happen."

We found a corridor that lead to a branch off of three different hallways. One hallway was pink, one hallway was blue, and one hallway was purple. Each hallway had a small sign next to it. I went up to the sign to read it, though to be honest I can't really read too well without reading glasses, but like hell if I was going to put them on in front of all these people. I do have an image to maintain, even if it is intimidating.

"Aw man it looks like your room is down the blue hallway, man! I wonder where mine is." Ned sighed in disappointment before walking over to the other signs.

I shrugged and went down the blue hallway, not bothering to try to read the signs. I could have read them if I really wanted to without glasses, but it takes too long. Of course, I realized my mistake when I saw the doors had words on them as well. I decided to go for the door with a word that appeared to have a short word. My name only has three letters in it, so I figured it must have been mine. I tried the key into the lock and... nothing! It wouldn't budge! I fiddled around with it to the best of my ability and the door would absolutely not budge!

"This door is broken!" I sighed. I then heard someone angrily clear their throat behind me. I turned around and saw UleGapa angrily looking at me .

"YOU'RE NOT ULE GAPA!" he screeched before he leaned in next to me, only about an inch away from my face. "I AM ULE GAPA! THE DOOR SAYS ULE!" he screamed right in my ear.

I had to cover my ears because his scream made them start ringing.

"You're name is Kev, isn't it?" he asked me, venom in his voice.

"Yeah! What's it to ya?" I asked bitterly.

"You're room is RIGHT THERE you dipshit!" UleGapa hissed as he pointed to my actual room's door. "Learn to fucking read! I was forced to learn your shitty culture and you can't even function within your own culture and you were fucking born here! Holy shit!"

"Fuck off!" I flipped him off before going over to my room. I didn't even care if I angered him to be honest. I heard him angrily open the door before slamming it. I rolled my eyes as I put the key in the door's lock. This door had no trouble opening. I stepped inside and was a bit disturbed by what I saw. Sure enough, there was a television looming over the bed, but there was also a surveillance camera right next to it, which I found unnerving. Why would anyone need to watch us in our bedrooms?

I looked around the room and it seemed pretty empty besides a bed, a drawer that had several outfits that I would wear on a regular basis (which I found odd. it's almost like all of this was planned), a small bathroom, two medium sized mirrors on the walls in the exact same position across from each other, two medium sized pictures of a leafless tree positioned in an odd spot on the wall positioned the same way on the walls across from each other, and a small table with a gift basket on top of it. I decided to look into the gift basket and found a sketch book with some mechanical pencils, pencil lead refills, and erasers. I also found a switch blade, which I decided to put in my pocket just in case I needed to defend myself from any crazy person trying to murder me. I looked in the bathroom and it looked like an ordinary bathroom with a sink, a shower, and a toilet. On the sink's counter was a tooth brush with tooth paste I regularly use, a hair comb, hair gel and spray that I regularly use, deodorant, and hand soap. In the shower there was shampoo and body was I regularly used. I was honestly weirded out by all of the familiar products I regularly use being in this room. I just got here, how the hell do they know what kind of shampoo I use?

"We just want you to be as comfortable as possible!" Tanezumi spoke up from behind me. I jumped, nearly falling into the shower.

"Did I spook you? HA! I thought you were a punk rocker! Punk rockers aren't supposed to get scared, poser!" she mocked and laughed.

"I wasn't scared, you turd!" I hissed. "You just surprised me. I didn't expect you to be there. How did you even get in?"

"You left the door open, dingus!" Tanezumi laughed. "Enjoy your familiar products, it may be your last day to enjoy them!"

"Whatever!" I waved her off.

Tanezumi disappeared after that. I shrugged and exited my room, being sure to close the door this time. I didn't want that rat back in my room. No one was around in the hallway, so I put my reading glasses on to see who else had a room in the blue hall with me besides that asshole UleGapa. I groaned as I saw Nac's room across from mine. Next to her room was Villefoe, the bear guy with a beard. Next to Villefoe's room was Anthony's room. Next to my room was Celeste's room. I nodded and took the glasses off before hearing a quiet giggle across the hall. I look and see Celeste standing there with a grin on her face. The grin quickly faded the minute I noticed her and she immediately hid her face in her puffy sleeves again.

"What's so funny?" I asked her. After asking, I realized I sounded kinda harsh when I didn't actually mean to.

She let out a squeak and buried her face deeper into her sleeves. "I-I'm not laughing at you! I-I think you look nice in glasses!" she answered, barely audible through her sleeves.

"You think so?" I cleared my throat, realizing my voice sounded a bit cracked.

She briefly took her sleeves off from her face. "Yes!" she quickly answered before hiding in her sleeves again and running off in the other direction.

That little girl was quite strange. I shook my head and decided to check up on Ned. Before I did, I saw Villefoe exit his room. He looked at me like as if he knew something I didn't before leaving the hall. I shook my head and also exited the hall. I found Ned walking down the purple hallway.

"This place is weird!" he told me. "It has all the stuff I would normally wear and use if I were home!"

"Same thing in my room!" I sighed.

"The place doesn't even have proper wifi!" I heard Nac screech from the blue hall before stomping over to the corridor.

"That's all she's worried about?" I rolled my eyes.

"Why don't we explore the rest of the RV? Like the rat said, we should get aquainted with this place. Even if we aren't killing anyone, we should still try to learn about the place. We might be able to find the answers we came to look for here!" Ned suggested.

"Yeah I guess." I shrugged.

We walked down the corridor to get back into the campfire room, but I ended up seeing a door that caught my eye. "Hey, what's in here?" I asked going up to the door.

It was an ordinary utility closet door, but knowing Uncle Grandpa something really whacky could be inside there. Plus, in the utility closet might be weapons that Ned and I could use to defend ourselves. I opened the door and immediately regretted my decision.


	3. Chapter 3

Honestly, I do not know what I was expecting when I opened the door, but I certainly wasn't expecting this. For a moment, the thing was in the corner of the closet curled up in a ball. Its once bright colors now dark and off-putting. The minute I opened the door the thing snapped its head up and looked at me. It looked like it had been crying, its clown make up running down its face.

"No fucking way..." I shook my head in disbelief.

The thing suddenly gave me a look of anger as it began to open its mouth, revealing sharp teeth. It began hissing very loudly and slowly started to get up. I immediately shut the door and held it shut, making sure the thing didn't try to get out.

"I wasn't aware Pennywise lived in the RV!" I told Ned, holding onto the door.

"No kidding!" Ned was helping me keep the door closed.

"Really, asshole? You fucking spoil one of the fear game creatures?" Tanezumi appeared in front of us with her hands on her hips. "And his name's not Pennywise! It's Pogo the Sad Clown!"

"That's one of the fear game creatures?" Ned asked in disbelief.

"Yep! And I guess y'all will be seeing him tonight" Tanezumi giggled before angrily pointing to the campfire room. "Now go explore elsewhere, you fruit loop dinguses!" and with that she disappeared.

"I hope we don't get picked for that fear game!" Ned gulped.

"We should probably try to find some batteries just in case, though. It worked in the movie 'It'." I told him.

"Yeah, you're right. I hope they let us bring weapons" Ned nodded.

We walked over to the campfire room. Uncle Grandpa was sitting on one of the logs crying and eating pages out of a book. I honestly didn't want to stay and talk with him, but Ned nudged me. I knew why too, though I wasn't sure if it would be the right time to be asking him about what we came here for.

"Hey Uncle Grandpa..." I greeted reluctantly.

"Hello, Kev" Uncle Grandpa sobbed, popping a page into his mouth.

"Hey listen, I know it may not be a good time to ask, but-" I began to ask, but Uncle Grandpa narrowed his eyes at me before interrupting.

"Is that what this is all about?" Uncle Grandpa asked me suspiciously.

"You know?" I asked.

Uncle Grandpa sighed before holding his forehead. "No no no, Kev. Listen, just give up on it. It's a dead issue."

"But-" Ned began to speak but Uncle Grandpa put his finger to his lips.

"No! Please! There's already enough trouble around here, we don't need any more." Uncle Grandpa told us before angrily stomping off with his book into another room.

I sighed and leaned up against the wall, pulling out a cigarette from my pocket. "I don't know how he knew, but I really don't like that answer."

"Yeah, bro, that was a complete bummer." Ned sighed.

I put the cigarette in my mouth before taking out my lighter. "There's more to this RV tour than he's letting us in on, and I intend to get to the bottom of it."

"Do you now?" I heard a voice ask. I looked over to see Villefoe grinning at me, a book in hand.

"Yes, yes I do." I told him. "But what's it to you?"

"I just happened to overhear. Are you looking for something?" Villefoe asked.

"Yes, but it's nothing." I told him so he would stop pressing the issue.

"Very well" he seemed to get the hint. "Would you kindly share a lighter?" he asked before revealing a cigarette in his other hand.

"Sure, bro." I lit my cigarette before lighting his.

"Thank you" the bear man nodded before walking away.

That was a bit of a strange meeting, but I decided nothing would get done if I just stood in this room all day. I motioned for Ned to follow me into the next room, which was the famous kitchen/living room that is always shown on Uncle Grandpa's show. Tiger was in the kitchen with a robotic boy. It looked like they were cooking something.

"Hey Tiny Miracle, could you pass me the butter?" Tiger asked.

"Sure thing!" the robotic boy handed her a stick of butter before she placed it in the bowl and began to furiously mix it.

She looked up at us, her bleak expression not changing. "I hope you don't want any cookies, because these are all for me."

"Tiger, perhaps we should share with the guests" Tiny Miracle suggested.

"I'm too stressed to share my cookies with the guests!" Tiger hissed. "They're all mine. And if Steve even comes near them I will personally eat him"

"I apologize for Miss Tiger's behavior, she is not in a good mood today" Tiny Miracle apologized for us.

"Understandably so" Ned nodded.

I saw Mr. Gus and Pizza Steve sitting on the couch. They looked pretty bummed out. I didn't really want to hear their complaints, though, so I just kept moving on. I followed the arrows into the next room, which looked like a giant dinner table with a bunch of chairs. I figured this is where we would eat our meals, if they feed us. I went on to the next room and found it was an arcade, which was pretty cool. Adam was on one of the arcade machines playing a game, of course. So was Nac, and unsurprisingly she was playing "Super Pizza Bros. 2". She was squealing the whole time too over the obviously ripped off game.

"I can't wait to upload screenshots to my website!" she giggled to herself

I shook my head. I saw Belly also playing a game. It still bothered me that he wasn't wearing a shirt. Not because he was chubby, but because he looked so out of place. I feel like an asshole for it bothering me as much as it did, but there's nothing I can do about it.

I went into the next room and saw a library. So far, this RV tour has been uneventful. I saw Anthony and Chester lost in the books they were reading. Celeste was in there too. She had climbed on top of a ladder to get to a book she wanted on the top shelf. She seemed to be struggling to reach it. Before I could offer any help, she began to lose her balance. She flailed her arms in a weak attempt to keep balance.

"Woah!" she squeaked.

I immediately rushed over to catch her.

"Hey! Be careful!" I told her as I caught her. "You could have gotten hurt, and that's the last thing we need right now."

She looked up at me. Her hair was flopped over enough that I could see her eyes, which were widened. Her cheeks were bright red. She let out a loud squeak before she put her sleeves over her face. I sighed.

"Hey I know I look scary, but I'm not a monster! Stop being so scared of me!" I told her, trying to sound reassuring but sounding more annoyed instead.

"I-I'm not scared!" she buried herself deeper in her sleeves.

I gently put her down. Maybe she was embarrassed that she fell over?

"Do you want me to get the book for you?" I asked her.

She nodded.

I climbed up the ladder before looking down at her. "Which one is it?"

She pointed to the book she wanted and I took it down for her. After getting off the ladder I handed it to her.

"Here. Be careful next time. Ask for help when you need it." I told her.

She nodded before running away with her book covering her face.

"That was nice of you." Ned smiled.

"Yeah, being nice is punk rock" I told him, laughing.

Ned laughed with me.

We went on to the next room, which just seemed like a room full of bean bags. I saw Honey sitting on one of them and petting them, which I found a bit odd. But then I saw why she was petting it. It was an actual living creature.

"What the heck?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Ssshh, not so loud! You don't want to startle them!" Honey told me.

"What are they?" Ned asked.

"Who knows? They're awfully cute though!" I saw Gabriella lying against one of the big creatures while cradling one of the smaller ones.

Austin stood in a corner of the room twiddling his fingers.

"I-I want to pet one, but I am afraid I will accidentally hurt it! I'm really clumsy!" he sighed.

"Just be careful when petting one" Honey reassured him. "You can do it!"

"Yeah, we believe in you!" Gabriella also reassured him.

Austin nodded before taking a gulp and crouching down to pet one of the creatures. Instead of successfully petting it, he ends up tripping over the creature some how, which frightened the creature and made it scurry away. Austin let out a sigh and buried his face in his hands.

"Aw man!" Austin sighed, feeling defeated.

I didn't really want to stick around to watch Austin's failed attempts, so I went on to the next room. This room looked like a gym. I saw Bromanor and Xarna already lifting weights. They just got here and they are working out. I will never understand people who do that. I also saw Charlie bouncing around on one of the exercise balls, but I don't think he was trying to work out. Looked like he was just trying to play. He kept nudging the ball over to Xarna or Bromanor who would end up kicking it away and he'd just chase after it. Nothing too interesting here, so I went on to the next room, but rather than go into a room, I was met with a big locked door.

"Huh?" I scratched my head. "Why is this here?"

"I don't know, I kind of want to know myself." I heard Mooon Man say. I looked over and saw him standing next to me looking at the door.

"As Tanezumi law states, you get access to more rooms when you kill each other" I heard Steve sigh from behind us. We looked over at him and he was leaning against the wall also holding what looked like a cigarette, but didn't actually smell like one.

"So in order to look at the rest of the RV we have to kill?" I asked.

"Eeyup" Steve took a drag from the questionable cigarette. "I'm gonna try to override that though. That's ridiculous. You didn't come here to kill. What the fuck does Tanezumi think this is? Literally no one wants to pay money to use a shitty app that should be free, clearly literally no one wants to kill people to look in another room. Sometimes I wonder why she comes up with this shit. If she wants money she's better off hosting bank heists" Pizza Steve laughed, exhaling a thick cloud of smoke. "It helped me buy the moon"

"You don't own the moon yet, you're still making payments" Mooon Man corrected him.

"I own the moon!" Steve laughed again before taking a drag from what I now actually think is just a rolled up blunt. Was he seriously smoking marijuana?

"Lay off the oregano" Mooon Man gave him a smirk.

Steve made a kissy face to him in response before literally disappearing. I don't get it with these RV people and disappearing. Whatever.

"Oregano has the same effect on pizza people that marijuana has on humans." Mooon Man told me.

"So he was literally smoking oregano?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yeah." Mooon Man nodded.

"Nac would appreciate those factoids about him" I told him.

"No kidding" he giggled.

Before we could do anything else, we heard a voice over the intercom.

"Attention everyone! Please report to the dining room!" a voice that sounded like Tiny Miracle's voice sounded.

I began to walk back to the dining room, with Ned and Mooon Man following behind me. Everyone piled into the dining room and sat down around the table. Tiny Miracle stood before us with a giant tray.

"Dinner is served!" he said.

"Dinner? It's really that time?" Ned asked.

"Indeed!" Tiny Miracle told us. "It is 6 pm."

Tiny Miracle served us all plates of food, and strangely enough the plate I got was filled entirely with my favorite food. That freaked me out a bit. How did they know my favorite meals? First they have all of my usual stuff in my room, now they have my usual favorite foods too?

"Tanezumi will be in shortly to talk with all of you" Tiny Miracle told us before exiting the room.

"Wow! Chicken Nuggets for dinner? My favorite!" Nac giggled.

As everyone chowed away on their food. I just kinda picked at mine. Sure, I had a cheeseburger with crispy french fries on my plate, but I just wasn't in the mood to eat. There was too much going on. It seemed like everyone else was okay with the situation that has been presented, something just didn't feel right. Before I could get too lost in my thoughts, Tanezumi came in.

"Hello everyone I-" Tanezumi started before angrily crossing her arms. "Where the FUCK is Riley?"

Everyone immediately looked over at the empty chair where Riley should have been sitting.

"Maybe he didn't hear the announcement." Chester suggested.

"Someone get that asshole immediately!" Tanezumi hissed. "You were all specifically called to eat some goddamn food and listen to me talk!"

"Woah, hey, calm down." I told her. "He's probably in his room right now. He has agoraphobia."

"Well force him out of his room, then!" Tanezumi commanded. "He needs to get the fuck over himself."

"Hey, it's not easy getting over something like that!" Chester protested.

"Yeah, give him a break!" Gabriella frowned.

"If you want, I can go bring him his food." Honey offered.

"NO!" Tanezumi slammed her hands on the table.

"Bring him out here NOW!" Tanezumi commanded again before pointing at me. "I want you to do it specifically!"

"Me?" I asked.

"You brought up the agoraphobia crap. Make him get over it!" Tanezumi hissed.

"I-" I went to protest, but she interrupted.

"If you do not get him I will MAKE SURE you are the first to experience the fear game tonight!" she threatened.

"Fine I'll go" I told her rolling my eyes and getting up.

"Good boy!" she encouraged me in a patronizing voice.

I sighed and walked down the hallway. I wanted to read the signs right this time, so when I was sure no one was watching I put on my glasses. That was a mistake because as soon as I did I saw Pizza Steve stumbling down the other side of the hallway and I knew he saw me. He approached me and looked me right in the face with a confused look. He lowered his sunglasses before putting them back up.

"Bro, you look like a fucking genius!" he told me before laughing.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

He just laughed in my face in response and stumbled away, taking a swig of what I assumed to be alcohol from a bottle he was holding. He was also still smoking oregano. There's something very wrong with that guy.

I walked over to the split hallways and read the signs. Riley was in the pink hallway from what the sign said, so I went down there and knocked on his door. When I was sure it was his door I took my glasses off.

"Hey Riley, Tanezumi wants all of us to attend dinner" I told him.

"No please! I can't!" Riley pleaded with me through the door. "Please don't make me come out!"

"It's okay, Riley. It's just dinner! They're serving everyone's favorites. I bet they have your favorite." I tried to reassure him.

"I-I'm not hungry! Please!" Riley told me.

"C'mon! We're gonna get in trouble if you don't come!" I was getting a little impatient.

"Since when did you care about that?" Riley asked me.

"Since the fear games were announced I really don't want to get chased around by shitty monsters in the RV it seems stupid!" I hissed back. "Now c'mon!"

Riley cracked open his door and he peered through the crack. "Steve isn't here is he?"

"No, why?" I asked.

"Something is following him! I see it! He's trying to find me!" Riley began to cry.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"You wouldn't understand. Just PLEASE keep me away from Steve. I don't want that thing to see me!" Riley instructed me.

"Alright I'll make sure Steve leaves you alone! Just c'mon!" I reassured him.

"Thank you!" Riley nodded before opening his door. He checked all around before quickly coming out and shutting the door. He held onto my jacket as if hiding from the world.

I sighed and moved forward. Slowly but surely we would get there. I saw Steve stumbling into another room, which is good because I don't need Riley seeing him and freaking out. I wonder what he meant by the thing following Steve? I don't see anything. Maybe that was Riley's extreme fears talking.

I got into the dining room and showed Riley to his chair. He quickly sat down and avoided eye contact with everyone. I returned to my seat as well.

"Now that you're all here, I have a few things I wanna go over..." Tanezumi began


	4. Chapter 4

"I hope you had a good look around the RV" Tanezumi smiled. "Because you'll need to use all of it to your advantage."

"Well, I tried to have a good look, but it seemed like the rest of the RV was blocked off." Chester announced while raising his hand. I'm not sure why he was raising his hand.

"Well that's what I'm here to talk about" Tanezumi leaned on the centerpiece of the table before bringing her voice to a whisper. "Incentives!"

The sound of silverware abruptly crashing against porcelain dinner plates unanimously sounded around the room before it fell silent. Everyone's attention was on Tanezumi, except mine, I was still staring at my food. I don't know what she could possibly incentivize to be honest. Only a complete asshole would want to chase after any incentive she could possibly have for us.

"You get to see the other parts of the RV!" she told us with a giggle.

"See actually that's not even a very good incent-" Mooon Man began to interject, but Tanezumi interrupted him.

"Yeah Steve tried to turn you off to it by comparing it to shitty phone aps, but as Billy Mays would say, 'WAIT! There's more!'" she imitated the late infomercial salesperson. "Not only will you see some more rooms of the RV, if you murder someone and you don't get caught, I have big cash rewards for you on top of a free new car!"

"So you're saying that we will be free, rich, and driving luxuriously?" Villefoe asked.

"Yeah!" Tanezumi giggled. "Also, since I'm such a nice gal, I hid some Tanezumi statues around the RV equipped with information and immunity to fear games! Hurray!" Tanezumi cheered before putting her hands on her hips. "Alright, just let that sink in! … literally!" and with that she disappeared

Before anyone could even say or do anything, however, an actual sink walked into the room. Literally an actual sink. I had to rub my eyes and shake my head a few times to make sure my eyes were not deceiving me, but it was a sink. It sat itself between Riley and Honey, who were staring at it with skepticism in their eyes. It just sat there, out of place and awkward, for a bit. As soon as everyone went back to their dinner, the sink made a sickening vomiting sound before spurting blood out of its spout at full force. The blood shout out fast and began to cover everyone at the table, including me. I wanted to cover myself, but I didn't even do anything as I watched it spew out blood all over everyone as they panicked. I felt like I was in some kind of twisted dream as I watched Riley scream and fell over in his chair. Honey was covering her hair and shouting. Everyone else was trying to get out of their chairs, shouting and scrambling. Nac slipped and accidentally caught her flailing hand onto Villefoe's beard, sending him face first into the sink to the point he got a full face of blood. Nac was such an amazing klutz she accidentally slipped back with him and lost her wig in the blood pool in the sink. She screamed as she immediately put her arms over her wig and her actual short pixie cut.

I watched as everyone got drenched in blood, including myself. I just kinda let it drench me as I began to zone out. I heard ringing and I began to feel numb. The room began to darken it seemed and I couldn't help but wonder if all of this was really happening. Then I saw it, in the back of the room. It's eyes wide with blood smeared around it's mouth and snout. It began to smile at me, revealing sharp teeth. I've seen this thing before, but I do not know what it wants. It began to approach me before it opened its mouth and screamed. As soon as it screamed I felt myself shake as the room lightened and Ned was furiously shaking me.

"Dude! C'mon we need to get out of here, man!" he frantically pulled me away.

Everyone piled into the living room, covered in blood and shaking.

"W-What just happened?" Charlie asked, shivering and holding onto himself.

"TANEZUMI LET THAT SINK IN?!" Uncle Grandpa popped up out of no where and slapped his hands over his cheeks. "OH NO! SEE! THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T LET THAT SINK IN!"

"What the fuck is going on?!" Bromanor demanded answers.

"I know..." Chester narrowed his eyes.

"Who did it then?" Xarna asked.

"It's all Paul McCartney's fault!" Chester waved his finger accusingly into the air. "Paul McCartney disguised as that sink!"

"What?" Mooon Man slapped his hands against his forehead a few times. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

"What kind of butt fuck conclusion is that?" Ule Gapa angrily shouted at Chester.

"Hey! Don't yell at me! I'm just raising awareness! Paul McCartney is evil! He's probably disguised as that Tanezumi chick!" Chester defended himself.

"You're out of your FUCKING mind!" Ule Gapa screeched.

"No I'm not!" Chester growled. "Don't talk to me like that, ya hear?"

"I'LL TALK TO YOU HOW I FEEL I NEED TO TALK TO YOU, MOTHER FUCKER!" Ule Gapa's face became so red, veins popped out of his head.

"THAT'S WHY THEY CANCELED YOUR SHITTY SHOW I BET!" Chester shoved him.

"YOU MOTHER FUCKING DICK HEAD I WILL CHOKE YOU!" Ule shoved him back, fists shaking with rage.

"ENOUGH!" Honey came between them, trying to break up the fight. "We're not going to get anywhere if you keep fighting like this!"

"Who the fuck asked you, lady? Get your big tits out of the way!" Ule Gapa shoved her aside.

"HEY!" I yelled.

Honey stumbled and almost fell over, but was caught by Pizza Steve who had just walked into the room. After helping her up, he took his sunglasses off and angrily stared down Ule Gapa. I heard Riley scream and back into a corner hysterically.

"IT'S BEHIND YOU" I heard him cry.

Steve only glanced at him before turning back to Ule Gapa.

"You listen here and you listen good" Pizza Steve began before violently grabbing and lifting up Ule Gapa by his shirt. "I don't EVER want to see that kind of shit again! Do you understand me? If you lay your goddamn fingers on anybody like that again I will CHOP off your GODDAMN hands so you literally can't ever do it again, mother fucker!"

Ule Gapa angrily stared at him, but you could tell he had fear in his eyes. After a moment, Steve let him go, causing the blue disgustoid to stumble back.

"Are you alright?" Steve asked Honey, putting his sunglasses back on.

"Y-Yes..." Honey blushed and put her hand behind her head as if to scratch her neck. "T-Thank you!"

Steve nodded before turning to Chester. "How about you?"

"I'm alright, just a little slighted and irritated." Chester sighed.

"Let's not have anymore fights. You're only doing what that rat wants, and you'll make Uncle G cry." Steve told us before nodding at Uncle Grandpa who was sobbing in the corner.

"Sorry Uncle Grandpa..." Chester apologized.

"It's okay, Chester. I still love all of you!" Uncle Grandpa sniffled.

"We love you too, Uncle Grandpa!" Chester smiled.

"You should get cleaned up, you all look like used tampons!" Pizza Steve laughed before pulling out an oregano blunt and lighting it.

"Pizza Steve!" Uncle Grandpa scolded.

Pizza Steve shrugged and took a hit in response. "I honestly can't stay sober long enough for this shit, Uncle G." and with that he walked out of the room, a trail of smoke behind him.

Uncle Grandpa got up and followed.

We all went to our rooms after that to clean up. I immediately went into the bathroom and stripped myself of my blood soaked clothes, tossing them into the hamper and immediately turning on the shower. After the copious amounts of shit I had to go through and witness today, it felt relaxing just taking a simple hot shower. After washing myself, I just kinda stood there letting the water hit me. For once throughout this entire day, I felt relaxed and care free, but that was short lived when I felt a presence behind me. I slowly turned around to look and came face to face with that thing I saw in the dining room. It let out a loud scream in my ear, causing me to fall over and take the entire shower curtain with me. I hit my knee pretty badly and I felt like a complete idiot sprawled out on the floor wrapped in a shower curtain dubbed over in pain from my knee and the ringing in my ear.

After a bit, I finally picked myself up, threw the shower curtain down in frustration, shut off the shower, and dried myself off with a towel.

"Fucking bullshit" I muttered to myself. I felt like I was already in a fear game, but I've been seeing that crazy thing way before I came here. Ever since I played with a ouija board with Ned, I've been seeing that creature. I can never get a good look at it, but it wears all white, it has blood on its face, and it has horns. I'm not sure what it wants from me, but from time to time it likes to pop up and scare the absolute shit out of me by screaming in my ear. You'd think I'd be used to it by now if I've had this problem, but it comes so sporadically that I never know when to expect it and even if I do expect it, the screaming alone is enough to send me flying into the other wall.

I got dressed into pajamas before going to clean up the bathroom a bit. I'm not used to cleaning, so I did a sloppy job putting up the shower curtain and wiping up the floor, but it would have to do for now. I decided to keep my hair flopped over rather than attempt to spike it. It was late anyways and I just don't feel like spiking it right now. I left the room to grab a bowl of cereal. I glanced over at the clock to see it was almost time for us to go into our rooms for the night, so I figured grabbing a quick bowl of cereal wouldn't hurt. I had nothing to eat for dinner so I was hungry.

I went into the kitchen. Before I could look in a cabinet, I heard a voice behind me. "Would you like some assistance?" I heard a robotic voice asked me.

I turned around and saw Tiny Miracle standing there with his usual eager face.

"Uh, I just want some cereal" I told him.

"Coming right up!" Tiny Miracle told me before immediately and stylishly making me a bowl of my favorite cereal without me having to tell him what kind of cereal I wanted. He handed it to me when it was done.

"Thanks" I nodded before sitting down and scooping some up.

A moment later, Steve sat across from me, just staring at me and smoking his oregano.

"What?" I finally asked.

He took off his sunglasses and smirked at me. Or at least I thought he was smirking at me.

"You're just going to let this happen?" he asked.

"What?" I raised my eyebrow at him.

He actually looked at me and shushed me before shifting his gaze back in my direction.

"I can't talk much right now, but I guess I'll see you tonight. On another note, did you happen rip out another 'Nice Guy's' throat? I always love hearing about that." he asked.

Silence. Then he laughed.

"Good. Asshole fucking deserved it for subjecting a lady to that bullshit." Steve nodded before taking another hit of his oregano. "Mmmm it's been a pleasure speaking with you, but we'll have much more to discuss later."

He giggled before getting up. I stopped him, though.

"What the hell was that all about?" I asked.

"Someone has an interest in you. You should try to talk to that someone more often." he told me.

"That thing that screams in my ear?" I asked.

"That's a greeting" he laughed.

"Why me?" I asked.

"Relax" he told me before leaving.

Suddenly an announcement was heard over the loud speaker.

"CALLING ALL THE BASIC BITCHES! Y'ALL BETTER GET YOUR ASSES IN YOUR ROOMS! THE FEAR GAMES WILL BE STARTING SOON!"

I shook my head before taking my last bite of cereal. I briskly walked to my room. After that strange encounter with Steve, I didn't really want to be out and about. Before I could go into my room, I was stopped by Celeste, who was peaking out of her room. She put her sleeve over her face as I came by.

"O-oh..." she squeaked out. "T-There you are..."

"You were looking for me?" I asked.

"Well, I just..." her voice trailed off before she swallowed and cleared her throat. "I just wanted to thank you for earlier when you saved me from falling and got the book I really wanted to read."

"No problem!" I smiled. "As I told my buddy, Ned, helping people is punk rock!"

She giggled. "The book I picked is about beings who interact with each other through their different dimensions. It's quite interesting! It focuses mostly on a teenaged boy and a female apparition."

"Interesting" I told her like as if that were a very interesting topic I haven't heard before, but I was getting sick of all this invisible ghost and paranormal shit.

"The boy is kinda scared of the girl right now, but the girl only wants to be his friend. The boy fears the girl wants to hurt him." she explained to me.

"Well maybe he wouldn't be so scared if the girl actually told him that she's not trying to hurt him and actually try to effectively communicate." I told her.

"It isn't so simple!" she frowned. "But she's trying. She just needs some time."

"I guess..." I nodded.

"Sorry for rambling! I just wanted to thank you!" she put her sleeve in front of her face again.

"No problem" I nodded and smiled.

"Good night!" she waved.

"Good night" I waved back.

She squeaked and immediately shut the door. I went into my room, making sure to lock the door. I sketched for a while until it was time for the fear games. When it was time, an announcement sounded as the TVs went on, revealing Tanezumi in a newscaster outfit.

"YOU BETTER BE AWAKE! IT'S TIME FOR THE FEAR GAME! AND THE UNLUCKY PICK IS..."


	5. Fear Game:Shit-Com

"ULE GAPA!" Tanezumi laughed. The cameras shifted to Ule Gapa sitting in his room with a shocked look on his face.

"You have got to be FUCKING kidding me!" he shouted as he threw off his bed sheets and angrily got up.

"Let the fear games BEGIN!" Tanezumi cackled as Ule Gapa's room slowly started to form into an old television studio set.

"What the fuck!" Ule Gapa looked around at the studio set, which was clearly abandoned.

He slowly walked through the old set, which looked like something out of a generic sitcom. It had a cookie-cutter living room from what I could see. He walked up to the couch and placed his hand on one of the tables before immediately taking it away.

"UGH!" he yelled out as he shook off his hand. The table now had his hand print on it, because apparently it was covered in a thick dust like everything else in the room. I almost didn't notice it until he put his hand down on the table.

He walked over to the coffee table next to the couch and lifted up a photograph. The camera zoomed into the photograph and revealed a picture of Ule Gapa grumpily staring at the audience with happy-go lucky looking characters that looked kind of like cheesy rip-offs of Uncle Grandpa's crew. Ule sighed before putting the photo back down.

"Of course my fear game will be based off of this" he rolled his eyes before squinting. "What the..."

He slowly turned around, and what came into focus were words written in blood on the back wall that read 'Start off the show!'.

Ule Gapa sighed. "What if I refuse? Will the fear game continue if I refuse?"

Right after he spoke, the sound of a metal object being flung across the room sounded as Ule screamed out and held his shoulder. Right after he put his hand over his shoulder, a throwing star stuck itself into the wooden floor with Ule's blood on the tip. The words on the back wall changed to 'Next is your head'. Ule sighed and went toward the couch. He put out his arms and immediately cheesy sitcom theme music began to play.

"IT'S THE ULE GAPA SHOOOWWW YEAHHH IT'S THE ULE GAPA SHOW BADUMDUM"

Ule gave a fake smile as he waved to the audience and sat down

"STARRING ULE GAPA HIMSELF AANND HIS FRIENDS~"

Suddenly characters started to pop up before him. The first to appear was a fat and greasy looking guy with sunglasses. He was trying to pull off a hip outfit that you'd normally see on a guy like Pizza Steve, but you could tell he was too fat and old for the outfit as his stomach stuck out of it.

"TRASH BOAT STEVE~"

Clearly the character was a parody on Pizza Steve. Now I can understand why the sitcom was cancelled. Another character popped up. This guy looked skinny and very weak. He had dark skin but appeared pale in complexion anyways, his clothes pretty much sagged right off of him. He had on a white tank top with loose jeans and oversized basketball sneakers. He wore an oversized baseball cap that said "OBEY".

"THUGGY GUS"

I was shocked at how stereotypical and racist the character looked. He was even named in such a racist and stereotypical manner. I was really glad this show got cancelled if this was really how the show was laid out. Another character popped up. Looked like Uncle Grandpa's zipper-mouthed friend Billy except she was a girl and had a colorful hippie dress on.

"BELLA BUTTS"

She immediately turned around and slapped her ass before the next character came up. This character literally looked like it was taken out of a Japanese anime and did not match with the other characters at all. She had brightly colored green hair and large anime eyes. She looked inhuman.

"TIGER LILLY!"

This one also looked like another stereotype, which bothered me as well. Was Ule Gapa that uncreative with a shitty sense of humor?

"ALL UNDER ONE ROOF IITTSS THE ULE GAPA SHOOWWWWW GOOD MORNING! GOODMORNINGGOODMORNING"

Suddenly the living room morphed into the kitchen and they were all sitting around the table with breakfast. Ule was reading the paper, Trashboat Steve was quickly eating everything on his plate, Thuggy Gus was chopping up what looked like cocaine and not even touching his food, Bella kept adjusting her bra, and Tiger Lilly was eating rice with chopsticks. The camera zoomed in on the paper Ule was reading and his facial reactions to all of it. Headlines all over the paper included things like 'ULE GAPA SHOW DISGUSTINGLY RACIST', 'WOMEN OUTRAGED OVER BELLA BUTTS', 'PIZZA STEVE OUTRAGED OVER TRASHBOAT STEVE', 'ULE GAPA SHOW A CANCER TO SOCIETY', and 'UNCLE GRANDPA AND CREW SUEING ULE GAPA OVER ULE GAPA SHOW'. Ule didn't seem angry, in fact, he looked more distressed than anything. He cleared his throat before putting down the paper.

"E-Everything sucks?" Ule Gapa uttered his line as more of a question than a statement like it normally would have been.

"Yeah mang it TOTALLY DOES mah *bleep*" Thuggy Gus nodded as he snorted the cocaine right off the table.

"I want some!" Trashboat Steve whined as he shoved the entire plate down his throat.

Tiger Lilly uttered something in Japanese, but the subtitles appeared on the bottom of the screen. 'Everyone hates this show that's why we were cancelled after the first episode. We should just kill ourselves."

"I HAVE JUST THE THING!" Bella screamed as she turned her ass to the screen and lifted up her skirt. There was literally no censor bar as she proceeded to reach her hand up her ass and pull stuff out. I actually had to turn away from the screen because it was really gross and disturbing. I peaked through my fingers periodically and found she had put a noose, a toaster, a katana, and a giant bottle of valium on the table.

Once the grotesque scene was done, I turned back to see Ule Gapa's crew around the table clapping and laughing. Ule Gapa, however, looked really scared.

"LET'S DO IT!" Bella laughed.

Ule Gapa stood up and screamed. "NO! THIS IS NOT HOW THE ULE GAPA SHOW WENT! THIS IS BULLSHIT!"

But that couldn't stop his friends. Thuggy Gus immediately grabbed the bottle of valium and just began to down the entire bottle. Every single pill in the bottle was gone within a matter of seconds. He then proceeded to snort the rest of the cocaine off the table before dropping onto the floor and presumably dying. I was a little disturbed just from seeing that, and I couldn't imagine how the other deaths were going to go.

Of course, I didn't have to imagine anymore because Tiger Lilly proceeded to chop herself in half with the katana, crotch first. She screamed as the blade ripped her flesh apart. It all seemed too real and hyper-realistic.

Bella Butts ran up the stairs and into the bathroom, where she proceeded to jump into a tub with a toaster and a few other electrical appliances and electrocute herself to death. She laughed and screamed in pain as the electricity ran through her body and began to fry her skin.

Trashboat Steve stood in the middle of the room on a box with the noose around his neck and a bottle of vodka in his hand. He took a swig before kicking the box out from under him and proceeding to choke to death on the noose. The back wall said 'PRODUCED BY CHEESEPUFF MIKE' in blood.

Ule Gapa screamed out before collapsing on the floor and crying. "NO! THIS WAS NOT HOW THE SHOW ACTUALLY WENT! CHEESEPUFF MIKE BETRAYED ME! THOSE POOR ACTORS! IT'S NOT MY FAULT! PLEASE!"

Everything was silent except for the sound of Ule Gapa's sobbing, sniffling, and gagging. A shadowy figure appeared before him with a sign. The sign read 'find the Ule Gapa logo pin and you can go'.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?" Ule shouted at the figure. "YOU WANT ME TO FIND A FUCKING PIN AFTER I WITNESS DISTURBINGLY RACIST AND SEXIST VERSIONS OF MY CREW KILL THEMSELVES?!"

The figure gave him another sign that said 'you'll have to dig through their bodies'.

Ule Gapa gagged and held his mouth. "Y-You want me to dig through their bodies?"

The shadowy figure nodded before disappearing. Ule Gapa began to cry again as he lied down on the floor. He gripped the floor and began to shift his knees uncomfortable as he sobbed and choked. Watching him felt awful. If that really wasn't how his sitcom was, then why was it cancelled? Whatever the reason, I dread having to watch what comes next.

After sobbing helplessly on the floor for a good fifteen minutes, he slowly dragged himself over to Tiger Lilly. He shakily brought his hands over to her body and slowly began moving her organs around in search for the pin. He sobbed and coughed the entire time. "W-Why?"

He couldn't find anything on her, so he went over to Thuggy Gus. He grabbed a kitchen knife off the table before going to work and cutting open his fallen crew member. Thuggy Gus opened his eyes as Ule brought the knife over to his chest.

"Aww man don't do it!" Please don't do it mah *bleep*" Thuggy Gus managed to choke out in a weak voice.

Ule cried. "I-I'm sorry..." he wheezed out as he lifted up the knife above his head.

"Naww man nawww!" Thuggy Gus croaked. It was too late, Ule quickly brought the knife down and stabbed it into his heart. Ule shut his eyes and looked the other way as he used the knife to cut through the dark man's skin. Ule slowly turned his head to look at his work and began to sift through his organs like he did with Tiger Lilly. When he found nothing, he lied on the ground and began the sobbing fit he had before. He knew he had to go through his crew mate Steve next. After another good fifteen minutes, he brought himself up and made his way to the living room.

Ule carefully took the overweight man off the noose and gently placed him onto the floor before kneeling down besides him. Ule performed the same stab he did with Thuggy Gus and went to work cutting him open. The entire process was slow and seemed to go on forever, just like the other times he searched his crew mates. With shaky hands he searched Trashboat Steve's organs and insides until he determined there was no pin inside.

He gagged and choked before turning to face the stairs. He began to slowly crawl up them, but was stopped when he saw Bella was on top of the staircase. She was naked and her entire body was covered in ashes and third degree burns. Her hair stood straight up and her eyes were wide and blank. She opened her mouth to reveal sharp teeth. Ule screamed as he fell down the stairs and scrambled to get away. He was too late though, because Bella was on top of him, practically humping him.

"CUT ME ULE, CUT ME OPEN!" she moaned into his ear.

"NO!" He screamed! "I DON'T WANT TO! PLEASE JUST GIVE ME THE PIN! I'M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING PLEASE!"

"CUT MEEEEE" she screeched into his ear.

Ule shoved her off with a loud grunt of effort before attacking her and stabbing her with the knife. He went to work cutting her open and searching her too, another long and drawn out process filled with tears, sobbing, and gagging. When he found nothing, he threw one of her organs against the ground. It made a sickening wet sound as it rolled across the floor.

"THERE'S NO PIN!" he sobbed.

Bella sat up and reached behind his ear. She pulled out the pin from behind his ear and showed him.

"It was behind your ear the whole time..." she laughed before her voice became demonic. "YOU DID IT ALL FOR NOTHING!"

She let out a shrill, ear-splitting scream before the entire room imploded and morphed itself back to Ule Gapa's room. Ule was sitting in the middle of the room in front of his bed covered in blood and in the fetal position crying.

The screen then showed static before Tanezumi appeared back on the screen. "Hope you enjoyed the fear game! Have a good night!"


	6. Chapter 5

After the fear game I witnessed, I had trouble sleeping that night. If that's how the fear games are going to be, what if I'm next? I don't know if I'd be able to handle something like that, even if I am a tough punk rocker. That was completely brutal, and it left me with questions about UleGapa. He certainly left the impression on me that he was a giant asshole, but maybe there was more to him? Maybe I could investigate and see what really was going on with UleGapa.

It only felt like I got to shut my eyes for a few seconds. Before I knew it, Tanezumi's announcement sounded on the speakers of the TV.

"Wake up you froot loop dinguses! It's time for another EXCITING day in the RV and another FEAR GAME tonight at midnight!" she announced in a cheery voice before the TV shut off.

It took me a little bit, but I was able to drag myself out of bed and get ready. I didn't bother to spike my hair again. I was too tired and at this point I just didn't care anymore. Especially if I'm in a fear game, I don't want some crazy thing tofind me because a hair spike was sticking out of my hiding spot. Once I was ready, I opened my door only to hear UleGapa scream.

I jumped back a little before going to investigate what happened. Ule was hunched over in front of his door sobbing.

"Ule?" I asked.

He snapped his head up at me, his face contorted into an angry expression but tears were rolling down his cheeks and streaming out of his eyes.

"Hey... it's alright..." I tried to reassure him, but that's when he opened his arms. When he opened his arms, a head rolled out.

It was the head of a woman. She had light pink hair, blue eyes widened and blood shot, light orange skin that seemed pale and blood drained, and a smile across her face. There was a note attached to her that said "You did this to her and you have to live with this for the rest of your life. - Mike". The note had a cheesepuff dust covered fingerprint on it.

"Wha-" I stared at the head in complete shock.

"That was my girlfriend. Her name was Grunnilda, Gruna for short. She played Bella Purse in the sitcom..." he told me.

"I thought it was Bella Butts?" I asked.

UleGapa slammed down his fists. "NO! Those names were utter shit and a giant lie!"

"Really?" I asked. I was genuinely curious, but it sounded a little sarcastic.

"YES!" he gave me an angry look before sighing. "It was UleGapa and his friends, Pasta Steve, Gussy Gus, Bella Purse, and Lillian Tigress. It was supposed to be an Uncle Grandpa parody, at least that's what Cheesepuff Mike told me. He told me he hated Uncle Grandpa and could make a better show and asked me to star in it. He told me it would be great because I'd give representation to disgustoids and help toward educating the humans and I would get a shit-ton of cash so my girlfriend and I could stop living in poverty. I took the offer because I was sick of living in the shitty conditions humans forced me in, and I believed it'd help me overcome my anger issues."

"Who's Cheesepuff Mike?" I asked.

"A fucking dick head, but I'll get to that in a fucking minute if you let me finish!" he waved his hand at me angrily. Even after a traumatizing fear game experience, he's still bitter and angry. I guess it's understandable, though. "So I took the job, and we filmed the sitcom over a few month basis. It was a fun experience and I did get a hefty paycheck. It seemed like it would be a funny show from the edited clips Mike showed me. Nothing like what actually aired on TV. It seemed like a better version of Uncle Grandpa, where my friends would unwittingly drag me into silly situations where we'd have to find a solution and grow as characters in a more sensible matter than Uncle Grandpa does it. But unfortunately, what aired on TV was god fucking awful. Mike edited the ones on the TV in a way where they were FILLED with all kinds of offensive and disgusting humor, especially taking jabs at disgustoids and making us out to be some kind of one dimensional stereotype of beings who don't know how to clean themselves properly, but the humans didn't give a shit about that. They were outraged at how the show made racist jokes about some humans and sexist jokes about female humans, understandably so. I was pissed too because that's not what I signed up for. I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to show the world that disgustoids are similar to humans and can be talented actors. So not only did we get public outrage from activists, Pizza Steve was outraged that we used a rip off of his name and sued us for ripping off Uncle Grandpa's show. Of course, he won the case and rather than Mike taking the fall, he blamed and pinned it all on me and the humans believed him. The court case put me and all the other actors in crippling debt. So bad, that all of them except me killed themselves. I watched my girlfriend kill herself right in front of me. I was ready to die too, but then I saw they wanted contestants here and I figured this would be the best way to avenge my girlfriend. To give that piece of shit pizza man a piece of my mind!"

"Were you planning to kill him?" I asked.

"No, but I was gonna beat the shit out of him after this tour was over and steal his money and tell him all about what he did to me!" he clenched his fist. "Then I was gonna find that son of a bitch Mike and fucking kill him!"

"I'm sorry to hear all of that..." I told him.

Ule looked up at me in anger before sighing and dropping his head. He unclenched his fist before speaking. "It's fine... you aren't the one who did this."

He picked up his girlfriend's decapitated head before getting up. "I'm gonna put her in a safe place and then join you all for breakfast."

"Alright" I told him. He nodded before going back into his room.

I made my way to the dining room, feeling a bit better that now I know Ule's story, but it was still pretty shitty what happened. Hopefully the blood from that sink was cleared up this time.

When I got to the dining room, it was cleaned and everyone was sitting there chatting with each other, awkwardly but it seemed like everyone was trying to get over the disturbing thing we all witnessed last night. I saw Riley holding Honey's hand. He still had that terrified look in his eyes, but I could tell he felt a little safer holding onto her hand. Good for him. As I walked over to my seat, I overheard Nac letting out an annoyed sigh.

"This weird guy has been HITTING ON ME on my website! It is soooo annoying and gross! He must be a lonely bronifriendzoni!" she told Villefoe, who was sitting next to her. She showed him what I assume was the message on her phone.

"Seems this fellow can't take no for an answer..." Villefoe sighed.

"I know right? Like can't he just go away? I keep telling him to leave me alone!" she tugged on her new pink wig. Her other wig must be in the wash.

"Perhaps I could take care of him for you?" Villefoe asked, taking a sip of his tea.

Nac giggled. "We need to find him first!"

As I sat in my seat between Ned and Chester, Ned immediately began to nudge my shoulder.

"Dude! Check it, this guy has a fucking SKULL COLLECTION! That's so fucking cool, bro!" Ned told me as he pointed to Chester, who bashfully looked up with a small grin.

"Eh, it's nothing really. Sometimes I find them myself taking some nice strolls in the woods, and sometimes I buy them." Chester nodded before tapping his chin. "Though, I'm not too sure how they managed to put my skull collection in my room here, but it brings me a little peace knowing that I can still look at it and polish them."

"Why skulls?" I asked. "Not that there's anything wrong with that, it sounds totally awesome."

"I guess I just like the way they look. It is interesting to see the inner makings of something, I guess." he answered.

I'll admit, the answer creeped me out a little within context of this shitty situation we are trapped in.

"Will you ever get your hands on the skulls of all 4 Beatles members?" asked Ned.

"I might some day... though I really just want Paul McCartney's head! He's awful!" Chester clenched his fist.

Tiny Miracle came in at that moment and started to give us our plates. It had our favorite breakfast foods on it, unsurprisingly at this point. Since I have two favorites for breakfast, they gave me my favorite cereal and a plate of bacon, eggs, and hash browns. I didn't feel like eating the cereal today, so I ate the bacon, eggs, and hash browns instead. UleGapa trudged into the room and sat down in his seat before Chester waved his hand at Tiny Miracle who was setting down the last plate.

"Hey, uhm, two questions." Chester cleared his throat. "One, can I get some more syrup for my pancakes? And two, how do you guys know exactly what to give us for a meal?"

"Of course!" Tiny Miracle nodded before a bottle of syrup came out of his arm. He handed it to Chester.

"Thanks!" Chester smiled before getting to work putting the syrup on his pancakes.

"As for your second question, this was Uncle Grandpas last minute idea. He said since you are all stuck in the RV, he wants you to enjoy yourselves. He also wants to make sure your comfort levels are at a maximum level so you do not get the urge to kill each other. He doesn't want you to play Tanezumi's game." Tiny Miracle explained.

"That makes sense" I nodded.

"Yeah, there's no way that Tanezumi chick wants us to be happy. She tried to take credit for it, though." Chester laughed. "And Paul McCartney never wants us to be happy"

"Did I answer all of your questions, Mr. Zarke?" Tiny Miracle asked.

"Yes, thank you so much!" Chester thanked him again before happily digging into his pancakes.

I looked over and caught Celeste staring at me. She quickly turned away once she noticed me notice her. She had quite the fancy breakfast, with cereal in a fancy silverware bowl, a cup of tea, and a croissant. Looks like she ate half of the croissant already and barely touched anything else. I nodded before Ned broke my thoughts.

"Bro, what did you think of that bullshit last night?" he asked me.

"Brutal" I answered with one word, hoping he wouldn't keep talking about it.

"Ule got it really good last night! I really hope we don't end up like that!" Ned kept pressing on the subject.

"Yeah" I answered again, hoping he'd shut up about it already.

Shortly after I answered Ned, Ule got up out of his seat and cleared his throat. Everyone quietted their conversations and looked over at him.

"Hey, there's something I'd like to say" he announced.

Chester rolled his eyes before whispering in my ear. "What? That I'm the psychopath that made him go through the game even though it's obvious Paul McCartney did it?" he chuckled.

Chester wasn't low enough when whispering, so Ule looked over like as if he heard, but he didn't say anything about it.

"I want to apologize for losing my temper yesterday." he announced before turning to Honey. "I'm sorry I said what I said to you and then proceeding to push you out of the way. That wasn't right. You were only trying to help."

Honey smiled and nodded. "It's okay, I forgive you! You were just really upset. I understand."

Ule turned to Chester. "And I'm sorry for calling you crazy and shoving you. I was really panicked over the whole sink situation and when you suggested what you suggested, I lost my mind."

"I forgive you." Chester told him.

"What about me?" Pizza Steve asked, coming out from the corner he was standing in. Who knows how long he was even there.

Ule clenched his fists and looked like he was ready to blow a gasket. Steve came up and whispered in his ear. I could barely hear what he said, but it sounded like "If you scream at me, your other apologies will look insincere."

Ule sighed in defeat. "Yeah, sure."

Steve gave him a cheeky grin. "Thank yooouu" he lowered his sunglasses and winked at him before leaving.

Ule sat down and began to poke at his food. After breakfast, nothing much happened, so we were able to enjoy the day before the next fear game started. I decided to play some video games. I wanted to be alone, but Adam and Belly ended up bugging me to join in on some games. Though I was hesitant at first, I'm glad I went along with them. It was nice to just hang out and connect with people despite the current situation. After doing that, I went to my room for a quick minute to sketch an idea I had for a character.

I sat down and began sketching, but half way through my sketch something compelled me to look up at the paintings on the wall. I wasn't very happy with my decision to do so, though. When I looked up I saw that thing again, smiling at me.

"Please don't scream" I told it, but it ignored me. It let out a loud scream, but rather than scream in my direction, it screamed at the painting, which knocked it out of place a little so that it was hanging crookedly on the wall.

I covered my ears and shut my eyes as it screamed. It only lasted for a few seconds, but it felt like an eternity. My ears were ringing even after the thing disappeared and everything was silent. I put my finger in my ear in an attempt to help alleviate the pain I felt. I got up and walked slowly walked over to the picture. I shook my head in another effort to alleviate the pain before I examined the now crooked picture. Rather than fix it, I decided to just take it off its hinges. When I did, I saw something extremely strange.


	7. Chapter 6

I had to do a double take and rub my eyes to make sure my eyes were not deceiving me, but they weren't. What I was seeing was real. I saw Ned staring back at me. UleGapa's room in the background, but Ned at the forefront staring at me. He leaned into the window, seemingly examining something. It took me a minute to realize he wasn't staring at me, but rather, he was viewing his own reflection and I was viewing him through a two way mirror. He didn't have his sunglasses on like he usually did, but his eyes didn't seem right. His normally green eyes had a red ring around them. Was he sick? What was he even doing in UleGapa's room anyways?

After examining himself, he smiled. His smile looked strange though. His teeth were pointier than usual. What was going on? Was what I was seeing even real? And if these are double sided mirrors, could they see me too? I looked over at the mirror next to the painting and shuddered at the though of Ule being able to see me if he just took his painting down. I glanced back at the two way mirror and found Ned was gone. He must have left the room. I should definitely ask him about that later. I went over to the other painting and took it down. There was another two way mirror there that revealed Celeste's room with Celeste sitting on her bed with a piece of paper and some crayons. I smiled. She looked really cute sitting there and drawing. I wanted to see her drawings. I hoped she'd show me her drawings sometime when she felt more comfortable around me.

I started to examine the rest of her room and soon got what I wanted. I was able to see her drawings, but I don't think I was ready. It was a silly cartoon drawing of me with a big heart around it. There was another one of her hugging me and some hearts around it. I will admit, I am kind of shocked that she sees me that way. I always thought she was scared of me. Unfortunately for her, I'm a little bit too old for her. She looked like she was in her early teens or even her tweens, and I'm almost 18 years old. I chuckled and shook my head before putting the painting back up. Then I realized, if she took her painting down she could see me. I hope she didn't do that. It just made being in the room a lot more uncomfortable than it already was.

I left the room to go find Ned, but I was stopped by Charlie in front of the gym room.

"Hey! Can you play ball with Chester, Riley, Honey, Gabriella, and I? We need another person on the team! Xarna and Bromanor don't wanna play." he asked eagerly.

"Uhh..." I didn't really want to play, I was ready to tell him no but he grabbed my hand.

"GREAT! Let's play!" he dragged me into the gym room and immediately put me on his team with Chester.

"So glad you could join us, Kev!" Chester smiled.

"Get ready! Here comes the ball!" Gabriella chuckled as she hit the ball over to us.

I wasn't sure what game we were playing, but Charlie ran at full speed toward the ball and hit it back at them.

"What's going on?" I asked, unsure of the rules.

"It's like a mix between volleyball and soccer. You gotta try to hit it in the goal just using your hands." Chester explained to me.

The ball sailed past Gabriella and hit Honey on the shoulder before it went toward Riley. Riley screamed and ran away from the ball, landing it in the goal. Charlie and Chester cheered.

"Aww man" Honey snapped her finger.

The game went on for a while like that. Most of the time we got the ball into their goal because Riley was a terrible goalie. They got it into our goal a few times though. During the middle of our game though, I heard the doors get kicked open as Ned ran down the gym with a bucket in his hands. Pizza Steve ran in after him.

"HEY! PUT THAT DOWN!" Pizza Steve yelled to him.

"FUCK YOU" Ned screamed as he ran toward us.

"Ned? What are you doing?" I called out the question to him.

I soon found out when he stopped in front of Honey, took the lid off the bucket, and dumped the contents of whatever it was onto her. From the looks of it, it smelled bad and was clear with white chunks in it. Honey let out a loud screech as she held out her arms, the foul smelling stuff dripping off of her skin and clothing and onto the floor.

"LOVE PAUL MCCARTNEY, BITCH!" Ned let out a loud cackle.

"YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!" Pizza Steve called after him, ready to tackle him, but Ned turned around and hit him hard with the bucket across the face.

Steve's sunglasses flew off as he let out a loud grunt and fell onto the ground. Ned violently threw the bucket at Steve while he was on the ground before proceeding to spit on him.

"NED! WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE?" I yelled out in anger, taking a step toward him, but he violently turned to me and put up his middle finger.

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME, BRO! DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH ME!" he screamed.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM? WHAT DID YOU THROW ON HONEY?" Gabriella demanded an answer as she frantically went over to Honey's aide.

"KITCHEN GREASE, LARD, AND FUCKING ROTTEN MEAT JUICE! PAUL MCCARTNEY TOLD ME TO GIVE IT TO HER IT'S HIS FUCKING PRESENT TO CHESTER!" Ned laughed.

Riley began to cry. "You're sick, man!" he said.

"WELL YOU'RE A PUSSY!" Ned flipped him off.

"YOU NEED TO LEAVE RIGHT FUCKINGNOW!" Chester yelled as he angrily shook his fists.

"BITE ME BITCH!" Ned held out his hands.

Pizza Steve quickly scrambled to his feet before lunging at Ned. "GET OVER HERE YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

Ned laughed as he took off at full speed. Xarna and Bromanor, who witnessed the whole thing, tried to block Ned from leaving, but because of Ned's small stature he was able to quickly sneak under them before they could grab him. Pizza Steve was caught instead, running full force into Xarna's strong muscles. Steve fell over as Ned got away.

"What the hell was his problem?" Bromanor asked.

"I don't know..." Pizza Steve sighed before getting up and brushing himself off. "Little asshole went into the kitchen and took a garbage container Tiny Miracle was in the process of taking out and fucking ran with it. Tiny tried stopping him, but he threw a wrench at him. So Mr. Gus and I ran after him, but he managed to give Mr. Gus a concussion so I was just running after him, and then he did this shit!"

"But why?" I asked.

"I don't know! He had no clear motive other than to apparently humiliate poor Honey over there and to violently assault me with a bucket!" Steve let out a frustrated sigh as he went to go pick up his glasses.

"T-That's not like him at all..." I shook my head. I was really concerned. Why would Ned do something like that?

"Well apparently you didn't know him well enough!" Riley shook his head.

Gabriella was trying her best to comfort Honey, but Honey looked far gone. She had a 1000 yard stare as she shook uncontrollably.

"I'll go get some fresh towels and a bucket full of soap water to help clean up Honey!" Charlie volunteered.

"I'll help you, brother!" Bromanor nodded as they followed Charlie out of the gym.

"Honey, it's okay. I-I'm here for you. We're all here for you." Riley reassured Honey.

Honey was silent. She just slowly brought her arms into a hug position and began to hug herself as she shook.

"I'm really sorry about Ned, Honey. I don't know what happened. He never did anything like that for as long as I knew him." I told her.

Honey still didn't respond. Chester angrily shook his fists.

"Don't worry, Honey, I'll make sure Paul McCartney pays for this!" he told her.

Honey finally snapped. "Chester! This is NOT about PAUL MCCARTNEY! Could you please just STOP with that Paul McCartney nonsense, please? I'm going to scream if I hear that name one more time!"

"I'm sorry, Honey. I'm just trying to help." Chester looked down.

"Well you're not helping! Just be quiet, please!" she told him.

"Fine" he sighed.

Charlie and Bromanor quickly came back with a bucket of soapy water, a sponge, and some fresh towels.

"Alright, guys, we should probably leave while Gabriella and Xarna help Honey clean up" Charlie suggested.

"I can help too!" Bromanor pouted.

"It's not very gentleman like, though..." Pizza Steve told Bromanor.

Bromanor angrily crossed their arms. "Excuse me? I'm not a 'gentleman'! I'm a lady!"

"I'm really sorry!" Pizza Steve immediately apologized.

Bromanor nodded. "It's alright. It's a common mistake."

The rest of us followed Charlie out of the gymnasium while the girls helped Honey clean up.

"I should go find Ned" I excused myself.

"Tell him to never show his face if he knows what's good for him!" Pizza Steve hissed.

I nodded and searched every room available in the RV. I couldn't find him, so I just went over to his room and knocked on the door.

"Ned?" I called out as I knocked on his door.

"Kev?" he asked.

"Yeah, bro, what the fuck was that all about in the gym?" I asked.

"Huh?" Ned seemed confused.

"What you just did!" I told him.

Ned cracked open the door and peeked out at me. "I was in here the whole time."

"No dude, you just poured kitchen grease all over Honey in the gymnasium, beat the shit out of Pizza Steve with the empty bucket, and insulted everyone! Do you seriously not remember that?" I wasn't sure if he was trying to pretend or if he legitimately didn't remember.

Ned opened the door fully and scratched his head. "Dude, I'm tellin' you, I didn't do any of that! I don't know what you're talking about! I've been in here almost the entire time! I went to the library to pick out a couple of books from a series I wanted to catch up on and I went in here to read them the entire time!"

"Dude, you're lying!" I hissed at him. "I saw you in Ule's room shortly before you came into the gym and humiliated Honey!"

"WHAT?!" Ned looked shocked.

"Yeah! I found out that the paintings on the wall hide a two way mirror that shows your neighbors room when one of my paintings went crooked." I told him. "And I was you checking yourself out in the mirror in Ule's room. How did you even get in there, bro?"

"You must have been having some crazy delusions because I never went to Ule's room or the gym! I was in the library then I went in here! I'm telling you the truth!" he told me.

"Ned, we've been friends for a long time. I don't want to believe you'd do such an awful thing to someone, but I literally saw you do it. I don't think you are telling me the truth!" I told him.

"Fine, Kev. Don't believe me." Ned sighed before going into his room and picking up some books that were on the table. "This is the series I was reading. The Hungry Games. The series made into a movie that starred Jennifer Larry who also played in Teenaged Fart Throb as Debbie's friend Gina. That's what I was doing the entire time."

"I just can't deny what I saw, Ned." I told him honestly.

"Well it wasn't me. Somebody must have impersonated me or something." Ned shrugged.

"Who's that short?" I asked.

"I don't know, Celeste maybe?" he suggested.

"She didn't do it. I saw her drawing in her room when I took down the other painting." I told him.

"Ew creep why are you spying on little girls?" he hissed.

"I wasn't! I didn't know she would be there when I took down the painting!" I defended myself.

"She could have easily dressed up like me and went into the gymnasium" he theorized.

"Yeah but the person even sounded like you, dude." I corrected him.

"That's weird. Maybe it was a ghost? Or Uncle Grandpa?" he started to throw around theories.

"It doesn't make sense, dude. Just... try to be careful at dinner. Everyone hates you now." I warned him.

"They shouldn't!" he crossed his arms.

"Well they do because they saw you humiliate Honey and now everyone wants to beat you up!" I told him.

"Well I guess I'll be missing dinner then if that's how it's gonna be. I'm not going to risk my life over something I didn't even do, bro." he sighed. "Goodbye"

He shut the door. I sighed as well. How could he not have remember what he did? What if there was an impostor? Nothing made sense. I heard Tiny Miracle's dinner announcement sound over the intercom. I decided to trudge over to the dining room and eat my dinner. I sat down next to Chester and Ned's empty seat and poked around at my meal.

"Did you find that asshole?" Chester asked.

"He's in his room. I told him, but he doesn't seem to recall that that happened. He said he'll be sitting out for dinner because he doesn't want to deal with everyone being angry at him." I told them.

"Coward!" Honey hissed.

"What even happened?" Nac asked.

Gabriella explained what happened to Nac and everyone else that wasn't there.

"Yeesh!" Eddie shook his head.

"How barbaric." Villefoe sighed.

The rest of dinner was quite silent after that, aside from Nac chewing Villefoe's ear off about something on her website.

After dinner, I went straight to my room to take a nap. I couldn't handle being awake anymore at this point. I briefly woke up to Tanezumi's 9 pm announcement, but I quickly went back to sleep. After that, I woke up to the fear game announcement. I didn't want to watch it, but I knew I had to. So I got myself up and rubbed my eyes as she made the announcement.

"YOU BETTER BE AWAKE! IT'S TIME FOR THE FEAR GAME! AND THE UNLUCKY PICK IS..."


	8. Fear Game: Ring Ring

"GABRIELLA!" Tanezumi announced cheerfully.

"Huh?" the camera clicked over to Gabriella's room as she looked around fearfully. "M-Me?"

Her room slowly morphed into a house, kind of similar to UleGapa's old TV studio set except this actually looked like a house rather than a TV set. It was dark with the only light illuminating the room was a television that was on. The camera showed Gabriella behind the couch and someone clearly on the couch behind her but we cannot tell who the person is. All that sticks out is an arm and some hair. Gabriella scratched her head before looking over at the arm hanging off the couch. She hesitated before speaking.

"H-Hello?" she called out, slowly getting up onto her feet.

She carefully and slowly moved over to the couch until the face of the person was visible. It was some kid from a younger grade at my school that nobody really liked. Melvin I think his name was? He was a bratty freshman who apparently still needed a babysitter even in highschool. Even after getting a lesson from Uncle Grandpa about selfishness (or so I heard), he still went back to his old selfish ways.

"Melvin?" she called out.

He appeared to be sleeping. His eyes were shut and he had quite a peaceful face. Though something about him looked strange. He seemed paler than usual. She took a few more steps over before gasping and slapping her hands over her face. Soon the camera panned in on what she discovered. He was dead. There was a giant spike impaled through his stomach and blood all over the couch dripping down onto the floor. Gabriella let out a loud scream as she fell over and crawled back against a wall.

"Noooo!" she sobbed.

Just then, a phone on a nearby table started ringing. She picked it up. "Hello?"

"You neglected your duties as a babysitter" a deep voice on the other end told her.

She sobbed violently, putting her hands over her face. "I'm sorry!" she choked out.

"Too late." the voice told her before the dial tone sounded.

As soon as the phone call ended, there was something standing in the corner of the room that wasn't standing there before. I had to squint to try to view it, but the camera cleared a little more for us to see what was standing there. A clown. A blue clown. I widened my eyes as I remembered that thing in the closet. Pogo the sad clown. Its face was sad and its eyes were full of tears. Its make up ran down its forlorn face. It stood there waiting for her to see him.

Gabriella must have sensed something watching her because she looked up to see not only the message on the wall, but the clown in the corner of the room. She wouldn't take her eyes off the clown, reaching for any kind of weapon she could. When she couldn't reach for anything she quickly looked to her side to see if there was anything there. Nothing. She turned her gaze back to the clown and found it right in the middle of the room a lot closer than it was before. Its face still twisted in sadness. You could hear it weeping.

Gabriella slowly got up and began to inch her way into the other room. As she did that, the clowns face slowly transitioned from sad to angry. Its mouth slowly began to open as its eyes locked onto her. Gabriella shook in fear, afraid if she moved it would lunge at her but if she didn't it would still try to hurt her. Realizing she had nothing to lose at that moment, she quickly ran into the other room. The clowned let out a loud hissing sound as its jaw practically unhinged and revealed sharp teeth. It quickly chased after her. The other room was a kitchen, fortunately enough, and Gabriella went for a large kitchen knife in a knife holder. She turned around to defend herself before screaming as she saw the thing running after her. She slashed at it as she ran away from it.

It kept hissing and lunging at her, only to hiss and back away from the knife. She did this knife chase game until they got back to the living room. She was just about to go up the stairs until she accidentally threw the knife across the room in the middle of her slashing. Rather than try to chase after the knife, she knew she had to just run away and try to hide. The thing hissed and began to lunge after her, but she ran with all her might up the stairs. She screamed all the way into the upstairs bathroom, in which she attempted to close and lock the door, but the clown's hand shot in. She screamed as she repeatedly slammed the door on the hand.

"GET OUT! GET OUT!" she screeched.

The clown yelped in pain as it took its hand away and she was able to successfully shut and lock the door. She leaned up against the door before sitting down on the ground to catch her breath. She immediately started looking for another weapon. She wasn't able to look too long to do so, because the lights flickered on and off and Pogo appeared in the mirror. Gabriella screamed as Pogo lunged out of the mirror to grab her. She unlocked the bathroom door and ran out to the bedroom frantically, shutting the door behind her even though she knew it wouldn't help much at this point.

The bedroom was dark, so she flicked the light on to see better. She immediately regretted her decision because once she did she saw dead Melvin lying on his bed. Above him was the word 'Regret' written in blood. Gabriella screamed and began to cry again before Pogo came up behind her and grabbed her. As soon as it grabbed her, the sound of a bunch of phones ringing at once went off around the room. Gabriella tried to fight the clowns grasp and scream, but it put its hand over her mouth and held her still. She finally stopped fighting to listen.

The voice sounded just like Gabriella's voice. "Oh yeah hey Trisha heehee how are you? Yeah? I'm just babysittin' you know. Stupid kids are outside playing space man or whatever. Making them some lunch right now. Kind of a lame job, but I need the money for the shopping spree at the mall this weekend! So excited! Well I gotta go talk to you later!"

The phone clicked before ringing again. Gabriella stopped struggling against Pogo this time.

It was her voice again. "Hey Uncle Grandpa, have you seen Melvin? He's about this tall and wearing a towel for a cape. I've never lost a kid before!"

Uncle Grandpa answered her distress. "Don't worry, babysitter lady! I'll go through every dimension until I find the exact one that he's in!"

The phone clicked and rung again.

"Oh there you are Melvin! Thanks Uncle Grandpa! Here, c'mon Melvin, let's go have your favorite, Dinner Sandwich!" Gabriella's voice sounded. She sounded very relieved to have found him.

"No, why don't I make the Dinner Sandwich for you!" Melvin offered.

"Oh okay" Gabriella chuckled.

The phone rang yet again, and I think Gabriella knew what was coming next because she began to cry.

"That's right mom! She was negligent and terrible!" Melvin's voice stated angrily. "And if it weren't for Uncle Grandpa, I'd probably be lost or dead!"

Whom I assumed to be the mother gasped.

"B-But they were outside playing space man the whole time with Uncle Grandpa. I didn't think he was actually lost I thought they were playing!" Gabriella told her, worry in her voice.

"You were SUPPOSED to be WATCHING THEM at ALL TIMES!" Melvin's mother boomed.

"I was! I was watching them out the window while I made their lunch!" Gabriella insisted.

"No you were probably too busy on the phone with your stupid friends!" Melvin accused.

"No! I only talked to my friend once and I told her immediately that I had to leave because I was babysitting! I wouldn't neglect kids! I know they need to be supervised!" Gabriella pleaded.

"Well, Miss Gabriella! You are negligent and irresponsible! You can have your money now, but I'll make sure you NEVER get a job babysitting here or anywhere else again!" Melvin's mother told Gabriella angrily.

"But I-" Gabriella tried to reason with the mother, but was interrupted.

"Go! Before I change my mind on your pay!" Melvin's mother told her.

The phone clicked and Pogo let go of Gabriella, who just fell to the floor as a sobbing mess. The phone rang yet again.

"I'll give you one last chance to prove yoru worth as a babysitter. Watch Melvin and if you can supervise him the ENTIRE TIME and not even TOUCH you cellphone, I will with-hold posting my poor review on your babysitting skills." Melvin's mother told her. "I really need you to watch him tonight. Something urgent came up at work. I won't be longer than a few hours, can you handle this?"

"Of course!" Gabriella told her. "Thank you for giving me a chance!"

The phone clicked. Gabriella was hugging her knees on the floor as Pogo watched. A few moments later, Melvin sat up. He swung his feet over the bed and stood up. When Gabriella noticed, she immediately sat up and backed into Pogo, who did nothing at this point.

"W-What-" Gabriella tried to sputter out the question, but was interupted.

"Wait until MY MOM sees THIS! You couldn't even watch me for ONE SECOND! You thought I was asleep on the couch but I was DEAD! You suck at babysitting! You don't know how to watch kids! They should burn you for being so FUCKING stupid!" Melvin laughed, but it didn't sound like Melvin entirely. The voice had a slight demonic hint to it.

"I-I-" Gabriella tried to choke the words out of her sobbing.

"You worthless cunt!" demonic Melvin laughed. "Slut, whore, bitch, CUNT!"

Gabriella put her head down in defeat, violently sobbing and choking.

Suddenly the door slammed open.

"MELVIN!" Melvin's mother screamed.

Gabriella looked up and everything was gone. She was in her room again. No clowns, no demonic Melvin, no Melvin's mom. Just her alone in her room. Tanezumi took over the television screen.

"Hope you enjoyed the fear game! Have a good night!"


	9. Chapter 7

I again had trouble sleeping that night, but rather than dreaming of nothing like I did last night, I actually had quite a vivid dream. I stood in a place that looked like one of my sketchbook drawings. It was a barren and desolate apocalypse land. I walked through it for a while, seeing strange shapes and random body parts along the way. Like a melted clock on a branch, a random eyeball on a tin can, etc. Finally a person came into sight as I was walking. I could not see who they were, as their back was turned to me. They had a black cloak on and mangled black hair matted on their head. The closer I got, the more it reeked of raw fish. I had to put my shirt over my nose to try and keep myself from breathing in the horrible stench. The closer I got, the more faint I felt. I also noticed that the closer I got the more the person seemed to change in appearance. The person got shorter and their clothes changed until they looked like Ned from behind. The horrible stench was still there. I called out to him, but he wouldn't respond. It wasn't until I put my hand on his shoulder when I realized something was wrong. The stench was not only unbearable, to the point I felt like I was going to empty the contents of my stomach right then and there, but everything disappeared and went silent. Everything went black and all I could see was Ned. We were floating in oblivion.

It wasn't until he turned around and revealed that who I had put my shoulder on was not Ned at all. The person who turned around had the face of a pig. I stepped back before it let out a shrill squeal. The whole scene forced me awake and I shot up out of bed seconds before the morning announcement even sounded. When it did, I paid no mind. I was just trying to grip what was reality and what was just a figment of my imagination at that point. It took me a bit, but when I felt a grasp on reality, I brought myself up out of bed so I could get ready. I actually spiked my hair this time, too, even though it seemed pointless. It looked better that way. When I was ready, I went to the dining hall for breakfast.

I was the last one there because of my spikes, or so I thought. Upon closer observation I found Ned was not at the table. I thought maybe he skipped out on breakfast too because of the shit that went down last night.

"Has anyone seen Ned?" I asked.

"Who cares?" Chester rolled his eyes at me.

"Well, I do. I know he did something reprehensible last night, but he's still one my friends." I replied, a bit of anger in my voice.

"Check on him after breakfast if your worried, then." Eddie suggested.

"I'm sure he's still hiding in his room" Honey laughed.

I sighed and poked at my breakfast. I just really wasn't feeling up to eating. Everyone's side conversations seemed to blur into one another. Nac's ramblings about her website and fanfictions, Riley telling Honey about a show he watched, Xarna discussing work outs with Bromanor that preps you on how to kick ass. It all blurred into each other. I was glad when breakfast was over and people started to disband and go their separate ways.

I immediately went to go check on Ned, but before I could go on I was stopped by Eddie.

"Did you need some help approaching Ned?" Eddie asked. "Sometimes its hard to convince people of the wrong actions they did. Ned's probably just avoiding his problems rather than facing them."

"Thanks, but no thanks." I told him before leaving.

Eddie nodded. At least he seemed to understand.

I put my glasses on and went up to Ned's room. I went to knock, but the door was ajar. I thought that was quite odd, and my stomach started to sink assuming the worst. I tried to push those thoughts away, telling myself that maybe Ned was thinking of going to breakfast but then didn't and forgot to shut the door all the way. I kept telling myself that when I went in I would see him sitting in his bed reading Hungry Games. I tried to stop the feeling of dread overcoming me as I proceeded to push open the door. Of course, the positive thoughts were rushed away as dread immediately took over the minute I walked into the room.

I covered my mouth and almost fell back. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Crimson blood splattered all over the wall and the floor and the bed. Ned's decapitated body with no head. Ned's head tossed on the floor carelessly with his face ripped off an his eyeballs popped out of their sockets. His face stuck on the wall like as if it was a holiday sticker decoration on a store's window. I closed my eyes and shook my head, hoping that when I opened them I'd see Ned was okay, just sitting on the bed and reading, looking at me like I was nuts and asking me if I was feeling alright. I desperately wanted to hear his voice just so I knew that what I was seeing was just some crazy hallucination this awful place has influenced me to see.

But when I opened my eyes, the sight still stood. Ned wasn't okay. Ned was still carelessly mangled all over the room. Ned was gone.

I let out a loud scream, something I would have never thought I'd hear come out of me in a million years. I kept screaming and shaking, completely and utterly terrified. Dread, guilt, shame, fear, and terror hit me at once and welled up in the bottom of my chest as I emitted this cry for help from my chest. Soon, people started to come to my aid, thinking that maybe I was in need of assistance but stopped dead in their tracks once they saw why I was screaming. I almost felt like my lungs gave out so I stopped screaming and just collapsed on the floor. Everyone from the RV tour was standing in Ned's room staring at the sight in front of them. That's when the TV flickered on and a familiar theme from Blue's Clues began to play.

"WE JUST FOUND A BODY~ WE JUST FOUND A BODY~ WE JUST FOUND A BODY~ I WONDER WHO KILLED IT!" Tanezumi's annoyingly cheerful sing-song voice sang with the music. Her song felt like salt in the freshly opened wound. Like she was mocking the pain of losing someone. Like she was specifically mocking me.

All the emotions I was feeling at that moment were too much. I had lost my other best friend. I had specifically came here to find a lost friend, only to lose another. I felt alone. I felt a complete sense of hopelessness. I felt angry that I had to be stuck here like this. I began to weep. I didn't even care how it made me look anymore. I lost someone important to me and I couldn't handle it. Tears blinded me, snots blocked my nose, and I choked on sobs. I felt like a disgusting pile of mush lying there on the floor. I knew he did something awful, but did he really deserve this? Maybe he was going to apologize? But we'll never know because someone thought that he deserved to die.

I felt someone kneel beside me and put their arm around me, like as if they were trying to comfort me. I didn't really bother to see who it was. I was too disgusted to even move. I heard Tanezumi come into the room.

"DAMN! One of yous really went all out! Now we gotta find out who did it!" Tanezumi told us. "If you guess correctly, you all get to live! If you guess wrong, everyone except the murderer dies and the murderer gets to go home free!"

I heard Uncle Grandpa also enter the room and erupt into tears. "NO!" he screamed. "WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?!"

"You will be given an hour or so to investigate the crime and ask around about it, all that fun CSI shit." Tanezumi began. "Then you will report to the dining room and start the trial, where you will make like Ace Attourney and discuss your findings and come to a conclusion of who done it. Probably the most boring part about murders around here." Tanezumi yawned.

I finally looked up at Tanezumi, who was standing there with a smug look on her face. "You mean your just gonna make this into a BIG fucking game?" I hissed.

Tanezumi laughed. "It is a big fucking game, Kevin! Why the hell are you crying? Punks don't cry. You're a poser and a pussy!"

Rage overtook me at that point. I got up to my feet, knocking over whoever was comforting me and lunging at the rat. "YOU FUCKING BITCH!"

Tanezumi simply stepped over and I almost stumbled into the bloody mess. She made a tut tut noise and shook her finger at me.

"Mr. Peepants! It's not very punk rock of you to try and hit a lady! I am very sorry you can no longer make out with your boyfriend, but you just gotta face the music. He's dead, now grow up!" she giggled mockingly.

I balled my fists and turned to her, but then I heard Celeste's voice.

"Kev, please! It's not worth it!" she pleaded with me. "Trying to hurt Tanezumi isn't going to bring Ned back!"

I sighed and looked down in defeat. She was right. It didn't matter what mocking and defaming things Tanezumi said about me or Ned, the fact of the matter was that he's gone and the only thing I can do at this point is continue to play this stupid game.

"Because I'm such a nice gal, I made an autopsy report to help get you started!" she chuckled before handing Villefoe a manila folder. "Good luck! You're gonna need it!"

Villefoe cleared his throat before opening the folder. He looked over at me. "Kevin? May I ask your permission to read this out loud in your presence? Or do you need to leave the premises for mental health purposes?" he asked.

I nodded. "It's fine, just read the damn thing." I appreciated that he asked me, though.

"Very well," Villefoe nodded and began to read the file. "Mr. Edward Brick died a tragic death at 11:03 pm. A simple decapitation did him in, but there are other marks on his body. He has bruises on his wrists that indicate a struggle, and he was hit over the head with a blunt object."

Villefoe held up the diagram that showed an outline of Ned's body that had arrows and marking to where he was injured.

"Well, let's get to work then..." Chester sighed.

"Wait a minute! We need to make sure no one tampers with any evidence!" Nac suggested. "If we leave Ned's body alone, the murderer could come in and change stuff on us!"

"I'll stay" Xarna said. "I'm a better body guard than I am a detective."

"I will too!" Bromanor offered.

"But what if one of you did it" Akira scratched his head. "Wouldn't that just give you the opportunity to mess with stuff while we're not looking?"

"If one of us did it, the other would be watching to make sure the other doesn't tamper with anything" Xarna reassured. "Hence the point of having two people on guard duty."

"True" Akira said. "Great idea!"

Everyone went their separate ways to investigate. Some stayed in the room to view the surroundings, others went to find other clues around the RV, and others just didn't really care all that much. I wasn't really sure what I wanted to do. Looking at my dead friend was awful enough, but having to examine him and treat him like some kind of murder mystery crime scene seemed dehumanizing. I wasn't sure if I could bring myself to do it.

Celeste approached me and took my hand.

"Hey Kev, I'm really sorry for your loss." Celeste rubbed my hand in her hands. "I was the one who was hugging you while you were lying on the floor."

"Are you alright?" I asked her. "I got up suddenly, I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I'm fine! I understood you were upset about the mean things Tanezumi was telling you" she reassured. "I just want you to know that I am here for you and I wanna help you find out who did this to your friend."

I nodded before kneeling down to her height and putting my hands on her shoulder. "Thank you. That means a lot to me. If you have my back, I have your back. Together we will bring justice for Ned and put an end to this chaotic RV madness!"

Celeste smiled and nodded. "Yeah!"

I put my fist up for her, and she returned the favor and we did an epic fist bump explosion motion.

"Let's do this!" Celeste jumped up, showing she was energetic and pumped, ready to take on this horrific game. It made me feel less alone.


End file.
